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Introduction 0:00
Welcome to the #PirateBroadcast, where we interview #interestingpeople doing #interestingthings. Where you can expand your connections, your community, #kindnessiscool and #smilesarefree. Let’s get this party started.

Russ Johns 0:12
It's a beautiful day for a #piratebroadcast. I welcome you to the community. If you're not connected to some of the pirates here, reach out, get connected. The thing about the pirate community is is that we're all part of the equation. We're all working toward the same goal and that's to come together in a kind and thoughtful way. I just want to make sure that everybody understands that we have an opportunity to #makeitmatter, we have an opportunity to make a difference. I want to talk a little bit more about that with our guest today. Also 9/11 is a a date that is really important to a lot of people. It made an impact on so many in the US. I just want to recognize the service people, the first responders, nurses, the people that are out there doing essential work these days. We're fighting a condition right now and a challenge in our environment, that we need to come together more now than any other time in history. I just want to take a moment because a lot of people are stressed out. A lot of people doing things. I wanted to bring Foley to the table and bring her insights in her leadership, some of the things that she's working on, and talk about some things that are important to both her and I. I thought it was appropriate that we do that today, on 9/11. Just recognize that this is something that we can continue to pursue and get better at, as far as humanity goes. So Foley, thank you so much for joining me. Thank you for serving our country and making sure that we're doing the things that we need to do to stay safe and stay consistent. Also, we found a thread that we're both project managers. Thank you so much for being here. How are you today?

Foley Hart 2:24
I'm very good. I am more than excited to be on the #piratebroadcast. I have two questions for you before we get started. All right. Have you heard any good pirate jokes?

Russ Johns 2:38
I've heard some pirate jokes. Tell me. You got a pirate joke?

Foley Hart 2:42
I do, too.

Russ Johns 2:42
Tell me a pirate joke.

Foley Hart 2:45
How do pirates know that they are pirates?

Russ Johns 2:48
How to pirates know that they're pirates. I don't know.

Foley Hart 2:52
They think; therefore, they arrrgh. I have one more. I'm sorry. I do have one more. Okay. Why is pirating so addictive?

Russ Johns 3:07
Oh, well, I don't know.

Foley Hart 3:11
They say once you lose your first hand, you get hooked. Alright, I'm done.

Russ Johns 3:23
I love that. Thanks for sharing that joke. I'll have to remember that. Alright.

Foley Hart 3:29
Ok what was the question?

Russ Johns 3:33
It sounds like you're doing well. Thank you so much for serving the country. You just got off of military duty and some training exercises and you're coming back post-COVID. Walk us through some of those changes and those challenges in the field, because training is so important to the military.Keeping current on the trends and the access and everything that's going on in the world is really important, so maybe you could share a few things about how that worked out and how that is different than it was previously in your exercises.

Foley Hart 4:10
Absolutely. So a little bit has changed. There's a new normal going on. That applies everywhere to include the military. I know we briefly spoke a little bit about this before the podcast, but for the military, we really have to figure out how is it that we're going to be able to move forward in this unknown environment, right? The military is all about trying to find solutions for things. We can't just stop training because if we stopped training, we're not going to be effective. And so in the COVID environment, we're taking all the precautions that the CDC is, is recommending, and really trying to step it up, making sure that we have temperature checks all the time. Making sure that if someone does come up with COVID, that we're not just isolating them, but everyone that they had contact with so that we can keep it from spreading. So that we can also keep our force ready. It was definitely an interesting experience. It's just one more thing to have to control on the battlefield that's a real world threat.

Russ Johns 5:20
Yeah. Yeah. I just admire the fact that you go out there and you do this, this process and this training and everything else that goes along with it. Another thing that I know we want to talk about and I know that is close to both our hearts is that there is a lot of transition in the military. You go from the military and I heard a number, at one point in time, there's almost 270,000 individuals transitioning from military active duty to civilian duty and right now, it's a challenging time. I know that you're in between activities as far as job and we found out that you're a Project Manager. That's something that I've done in my past and continue to do. Transferable skills from the military is very important, so how does that look in terms of support, access and some of the things that are going on? It's kind of vague at times, but I guess it depends on what position you hold in the military. Do you have any insight on that, that you could share with us?

Foley Hart 6:40
I do. So really, the biggest struggle that I and every other military person has had, translating from active duty to civilian side is being able to speak a civilian language that you have never talked. I'm sure on a very small scale, people experience this whenever they move from one company to another, right? One company might call it one thing the other company calls it another. The unfortunate part for military veterans is that there is no translation of this. One company says this; therefore, it equals this. It's, hey, I have done this. Some of it matches up, but it's a lot of real world experience. There's no equal to me at 23 years old, as a psychology major, but I'm in charge of construction engineers for 40 people and making sure that their families are safe, making sure that they have food on the table, making sure that they follow all the rules, that if they don't, they get punished. It's just the comprehensive nature of what the military does and what they teach is not something that's easily equaled on the civilian side. But you can definitely talk about things in generalities and kind of hope that your civilian counterparts understand a little bit about what it is that you're bringing to the table.

Russ Johns 8:19
I think you're in a unique position because being a psychology major and a project manager, you can see both sides of the process in the business world as well, because a lot of those skills, I would argue, are very transferable because you're taking large projects, complex processes, and you're breaking it down to a smallest common denominator to where you have a next step, and you can assign somebody that next step. Understanding people, I think, is the part that is really key in that position. So we may not speak the same language; however, we can actually see where there's some parallels in the task itself. When you can apply that and kind of walk through it, and see what it looks like, there are people that are detail oriented, and there's people that are very high level, visionary, and all of these different skills play a role in what we do in life. I think it's really important. This brings me to another point It's about people. It's about caring about people. It's about caring about what they're doing and how they're doing. Finding out what's going on in their world. I would anticipate this was a part of your role as well.

Foley Hart 9:44
Yes. As a leader, and I alluded to it a little bit for the military. You're not just you're not just looking at that one soldier who comes to work nine to five or whatever, right? You're also looking at what they do. On their off time you're looking at their social situations, right? Who are they friends with? Are they friends with a bad crowd? Do we need to steer them in a different direction? You're looking at, again, how their family looks? Do they have six kids? How can I support them as a leader, because when you look at a soldier, as a leader, whenever you're looking at your subordinates, you can't just look at who shows up nine to five, you have to look at the whole picture. Because everything in that picture is affecting what that person is doing in that small timeframe at work.

Russ Johns 10:37
Yeah, unfortunately, right now in today's society, all the stress that's going on and everything else...September is suicide prevention month and...I lost a son from suicide, my oldest son. It really touches a lot of people and devastates a lot of lives today in and out. I'm not sure how the military is handling it and I don't know that the awareness and the access to support and assistance is out there like it needs to be in. One of the things that prompted me to do the #piratebroadcast is, you'll highlight some people, like shine the light on some people and share a little kindness and show that it's not that difficult to care about what people are doing. I know, that's a topic that you're interested in talking about and you wanted to share a few things and a few ideas, so I wanted to open up the dialogue and allow you to share what you want to share with that topic. The fact that this month is suicide prevention month, so...

Foley Hart 11:53
Yeah, absolutely. Thank you so much for the opportunity to talk about it. The military does do a lot to try to prevent any form of suicide because, I mean, you can look up any statistics. Veterans don't have a good track record of staying on this earth whenever it comes to suicide. So the DoD came out with some great policies. I hope that I can share some of those with you guys with the Pirate nation, so that they can take those back and influence lives of their own. I just want to preface this too, if you are a leader, you need to care about suicide awareness. It just is what it is. If you are a leader who cares about people, you care about suicide awareness. If you don't care about people, this isn't the place for you and you need to step down because...maybe it's the coffee talking, getting me all amped up and excited. But, I'm extremely passionate about this video because, if you really aren't looking at the whole person, you're going to miss it, and then they're not going to be there and you could have affected it and you didn't. So what is your purpose? Why are you even in your position? With that, I do have a little bit of a story. I'm going to try to keep it really short. Every time I've told the story of Christ, I'm gonna try to like, bring it together, but, it's a happy story. I'll preface it with that...it is a happy story, but it's still gets to me every time just because every time I talk about it, I remember the emotions and it's just a lot. So I'll preface it with the story and then I'll talk to you guys about the steps that I took that God wants the the military to do, so that you can use this in your daily life, right? I commissioned through ROTC before I joined the military, so I was maybe 21 or 22. I was a junior in college and I had a young cadet. I was a cadet for sergeant at the time. So I had a young cadet private, come into my company and I'd known her maybe about a month and a half, before she and I took a drive. She asked me to pull over and she told me that she didn't want to be here anymore. Then I said...at first, well be here where? But in my head, I'm thinking less...so instead, I asked, what do you mean? And she said, I should not be breathing. I can't be on this earth anymore. So I asked her very directly, are you thinking of killing yourself? She told me, yes. So once she did that, I took steps to ask her questions like, what is the reasoning behind this? How are you feeling right now? Really just taking the time to listen to her. Through this questioning, she told me what her plan was, which was to jump off the closest bridge at the college into oncoming traffic. That she's been dreaming about it since she got here. So her plan was to do this on her birthday, which was a couple days from when she talked to me about it. So, a couple days later, well, I reached out to our local authorities, who help with talking to people and I got her hooked up with a social worker. she said she'd go to her visits and I thought everything was fine. Two days later, we were in the same dorm room. I'm asleep. She busts into my dorm room maybe at midnight or one o'clock, some ungodly hour and I don't remember what she said because she wasn't making any sense. It was nonsensical behavior. Unlike her, she was very like, rigid, jittery movements. I couldn't see her because it was at night. My lights were out and I just said, what? She sat at the edge of my bed and she said, bye and just bolted out of my room, ran down the stairs. I tried to keep up with her. I couldn't keep up with her. So while I was running after her, I called 911. I told them hey, my friend is suicidal. I know exactly where she's going. She's going to this bridge. I can't keep up with her. Please stop her. So, I caught up to her at the same time that the police grabbed her from falling off the bridge and the mix of emotions I had. I was relieved. but I was also extremely, extremely nervous. My friend, when they were pulling her away, she looked at me and she looked hurt. Like I had taken away the one thing that she had wanted to do her whole life. She didn't talk to me for four months. She subsequently went through therapy for a couple weeks and then she went through therapy for a couple years. Finally, she came around and said, you are the one that saved my life. Without you taking the time to care and listen and make the right steps, I would not be here. That's the reason that we're leaders, right? It is to help people and and she said, since now that she's living, she's been able to have the opportunity to learn about depression and learn about her feelings and learn how to work with them whenever she has those lows and the opportunity that she's been given just from being alive, even though she didn't want to be, at the time. She hated me for a long time for doing what I did. But I did it because I knew that it was the right thing to do. So I just wanted to use that story to outline that I used most of the DoD policy, I did mess up in one area and that's why I wanted to talk to you guys about this because she could have died that day because I messed up in this one area, and I don't want y'all to do the same thing.

Russ Johns 18:49
So, yeah...

Foley Hart 18:52
Oh, I'm sorry, go ahead.

Russ Johns 18:53
No, I just gotta say thank you for sharing a story. So the lessons learned is that regardless if somebody wants to in their own life, you have to do what you can as a leader to lead them to a different outcome.

Foley Hart 19:13
Yes and the way that I like to think about it, is if somebody is drowning, they're not looking around them to say, oh, I'm drowning. I need help, right? They're looking up at the sky. They're panicking or flailing, right? If you've ever seen or heard about a drowning person, sometimes if you throw them the lifeline that they need, they're going to swat it away because they're too busy freaking out right? So what do you do? You have to call for a lifeguard. You're not trained to be able to jump in and save that person's life as they're flailing. You need someone else's support. So that's really what the DoD policy has put out. So, one of the first steps is identifying when somebody is struggling with something internally. I also want to take away the stigma because anybody can get to that point. I can, you can, anyone can feel helpless. For some people, it's a different thing. It's a different trigger, right? It doesn't make anyone more or less weak or strong than another person. Everyone gets to that point. Everyone has that capacity.

Russ Johns 20:30
We all have the ability to have our demons.

Foley Hart 20:34
Yes, exactly. As leaders, and as people, to be honest, we need to be able to identify some of those signs. Some people show no signs, that one's a really tough one. Other people, they just have dramatically different behavior. They've been sad, then they're happy. You're trying to figure out why. They've been happy and then instantly they're sad. They start giving their things away or they start talking about having no future or, when I'm gone and blah, blah, blah, right? They start making those little things or they do what my friend did. They blatantly say, I don't want to be here anymore. I'm out of here. So that's your cue to do three things ? We call it ACE. That's how we use it in the military. It stands for, Ask, Care and Escort. So first thing is that you ask the person very blatantly, very pointedly, are you thinking about killing yourself? If you beat around the bush with that, they're going to give you some sort of random slew of things that's going to make it sound like they don't. If you instead ask, Are you thinking about hurting yourself, someone who is suicidal is gonna say, oh, no, nothing about hurting myself. Because in their head, they're thinking I'm gonna kill myself. It's not gonna hurt anymore. That's ending hurt.

Russ Johns 22:00
I won't feel a thing.

Foley Hart 22:02
Exactly right. So you have to be very pointed with it. it takes a lot of intestinal fortitude and courage to ask because what if you're wrong? What if that person isn't thinking about it? Don't be afraid that you're going to give them that idea. You're definitely not. You asking means that you care. Even if they're not thinking about it, it will still open up that person to talk about whatever their demons are, right? So ask. Second is Care. So you just provide the safe space and ask the questions to be able to make sure that they know that you're listening, actively listen to that person. Don't brush off anything that they're saying and say, ah, you're weak sauce. You're not. You're not. You shouldn't feel that way. Millions of other people feel that way. You're fine. That is not a safe space to provide for them, right? So care for them. Try to nudge them towards getting help. Those are all the parts that I did, right. The last part, though, is Escort, which I did not do until the very end, when it was almost too late. So the biggest part of this, and the hardest part is the escort piece, because you can care and provide the space and you think that you get someone to a place where they're going to go seek help and that they've dropped it, but they haven't. So escort means that you are going to stay with that person, either physically or on the phone with them or whatever, until you can get someone who is a medical professional or a police officer or someone to take that person to a place where they're going to be safe and get the help that they need. It's so hard to do it because people are tricky and my friend is tricky. I thought that I had it under control. I thought oh, I I've done it, I've kicked it! I didn't at all and it almost cost her her life.

Russ Johns 24:07
Yeah. Well, thank you for sharing that story. I know, in my, my experience, I've been in some dark places in my life and after having lost a son and friends and relatives and people that I care about, it's never easy, and the outcome is always the same, they're gone. It's an impact. It's not good. I just encourage everyone in the pirate community to be there and ask. Find out, care about what you're,talking about and get people to help. I'll post The Suicide Prevention line number in the post today and make sure that everybody has it. I know it's been going around this month. So it's just, it's something that we can do as humanity and just being people Everybody goes through some challenging times, everybody goes through some challenging moments and right now, the suicide rate is up. We have a lot of challenging things going on in our world, so just be aware of the people around you and the people you care about and make sure that you have an opportunity to reach out to people if they indicate there's a challenge and a need for helping out. So ask them and be bold, be brave, be there for them. I know that there's a lot of people in the community here this morning. Foley, I don't know if you've noticed this, but there's a few people out there, Gabriel's here. Hello, everyone. Good morning fellow pirates. Happy Friday. I love all you guys. The amazing @FoleyHart. Hiett Ives, good morning, y'all. It's a great day to be a patriot. Thank you so much. Gabriel says, good morning, Wendy. Michelle is here. Arggggh, she says. I like to read these off because it's a visual thing here where we are right now, but in the podcast, you don't always get to see this thing. So Randal says, hello Russ from Randal and Calvin from new Orleans. Randal is making a major impact on the food industry and all of the things that him and Calvin are doing, it's amazing. Russ, you need to remember these jokes. Yes, Michelle, here's the deal. It's recorded now for legacy so I can go back in order to find it. Cathi Spooner says, I love corny jokes. It's a great way to start the day. Good morning. Thank you so much, Cathi. Here we have Howard Kaufman, Happy Friday to the pirate nation. Fantastic. Gabriel says, good morning, Michelle You are such an amazing inspiration. She is Gabriel. We love her. Wendy's here in the room. Wendy, how are you doing? I hope you got some sleep. Wendy. Last time I talked to her...

Foley Hart 27:41
She told me she doesn't sleep.

Russ Johns 27:41
No, she doesn't sleep. Eileen says, hello. Grant says, good morning. Hey Grant, how are you doing? I hope your golfing is good. Michelle says, Gabriel, good morning, my friend and fellow pirates. Thank you. Eileen says, thank you for your service. Thank you, Foley, for your service.

Foley Hart 28:06
Thank you for your support.

Russ Johns 28:06
Wendy says, good morning, Gabriel. These two pirates could chat all day and I would be riveted to the screen. That's wonderful, Wendy. I think it was Wendy that introduced us wasn't it?

Foley Hart 28:20
It was. Yeah, she's she's been a beautiful light. For sure. I think that she's one of those people that she just finds a way to believe in everybody and everything because everyone has something to give.

Russ Johns 28:36
She finds a spark in every individual. Like she says, I'm the Jewish mom. Gabriel says, Howard Kaufman, good morning, my friend. Cathi says both our sons are in the military and we regularly ask them to speak English. That's too funny.

Foley Hart 28:54
It's hard. It's hard.

Russ Johns 28:57
It has to be hard. Gabriel says, one of my regrets is not being able to interview Foley Hart, Cathi Spooner or Howard Kaufman. Well, you're doing okay, Gabriel, you're doing ok. I'm sure that can be arranged at some point in time. Howard Kaufman says, Gabriel, good to see you. Andrew says, if that is all you regret, Gabriel, you are doing well in life. Now, go invite them. Wendy says, okay, I'm crying. Vulnerability is such a powerful opportunity for connection. Happy Friday, everyone from Angie Schumann. She's in Wisconsin, I love your open heart and caring soul. You are an incredible person.

Foley Hart 29:52
Thank you.

Russ Johns 29:52
Thank you, Gabriel. So kind. Howard says, Foley, great reminder of the importance of "servant leadership" or what would be considered "5th level leadership," from good to great. Laser focus on the mission with your ego aside. Thank you, Howard. I really appreciate that. Yeah, he's a pirate, as well. Gabriel says, Angie Schuman, hello there, Madam. Sheri Lally's in the room. Good morning pirates. Then we have Sarathi, hi russ and Foley and my pirates. Jumping in here late today. Wishes for the weekend ahead. No notifications from LinkedIn. Darn that LinkedIn. Thank you. My buddy, Gabriel sent you a link but you can chat here, too. SlapTagz is here, which is also Sheri Lally. Gabriel says, hey there! I am so happy you are here today. Happy Friday, my friend. This is such an eye opening conversation. Sarathi says yep and it's important to understand that even when you don't get paid, you be kind and helpful, but nice sharing, Foley. Feelings and emotions are deep. did counseling clinically and I noticed many people tend and I don't know what it's the rest is cut off so tend to be cold. I think that's a good point, Sarathi, and I just want to recognize this. Some people are nervous around approaching people on tough subjects. This is coming from me personally. Sometimes it's hard to challenge somebody when they're not 100% and you want to just grab them and take them to the doctor, take him to get help. Go someplace to do something with them. It's really about doing what you can to save an individual, just like you did. Wendy says, #ACE. I love that. Michael Baker, it's within you. Life coaching of spiritual means and guidance to achievement. Georgetown, Florida. Thank you, Michael. Yes, it helps to just let others know that you're there for them. I love that. Suicide Prevention Lifeline. Thank you, Gabriel appreciate it. It's 1-800-273-8255, so if you have somebody in need, and you have somebody that you know is at risk and you know somebody that needs a little encouragement, a little help to get out of where they are, call 800-273-8255 and if you're feeling this way, again it's 800-273-8255. Reach out and don't be afraid of asking for help. It's absolutely critical. It's absolutely important. Michal Baker says, good morning. Remember 9/11. Yes. I just have to say, Foley, that all of these subjects we can talk about an extended period of time and over over already. I just want to thank you for serving the country. Thank you for your service and thank you for your opportunity to share this story. That is so critical and there are so many people that are hurting right now. I know that this is not going to get reduced,and it's not going to go away until people start taking action. I encourage all the pirate community to reach out to people, make those connections and if you're not connected to fully reach out, tell them that Russ sent you. Captain Russ sent you and make sure that you have these conversations, make sure that the hard conversations are in place. Also, let people know that you do care. Make sure they understand that they have alternatives. There is an option. So any words of wisdom you want to leave with us today, Foley?

Foley Hart 34:26
Oh, boy. Well, I was reflecting on what Howard said about servant leadership. I think my last little bit of advice is really just whenever I was in the military, I'm naturally an introvert, but I was taught to lead from front, right? Be that A type personality and that's just not me, naturally. It took me awhile to come to realize that you can lead from behind, as well. To his point, it has to do with being a servant leader, putting others first. You cannot truly be an impactful leader, if you don't understand how to do that one simple thing.

Russ Johns 35:15
Yeah. There's another theory that leaders eat last. Yes,

Foley Hart 35:21
Yes, absolutely. Yeah and we do it. We actually practice that all the time. Every single child. I am the very last to eat. So, absolutely, we put it into practice.

Russ Johns 35:35
Well, I just want to thank you, everyone and join the pirate community. We have a lot of wonderful people here doing some amazing things and you'll never know what's going on around you until you start reaching out and reaching those around you. Leadership does not necessarily mean you have a title for leadedhip. Leadership means that you can take the ability and the opportunity to encourage others and allowing them to do better in their life. I know we see leaders every single day and they don't have a title. So allow that to take place. Foster and encourage that behavior and also, support the others around you. It's so important that we do this in today's day and time and efforts. As you all know, #kindnessiscool, #smilesarefree and you #enjoytheday.

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